Wednesday, April 3, 2013

Butt Plug 101: Butt Plugs that are Actually Good for Beginners

[Edit: I looked into it and the PicoBong Tano is the anal toy they have, but Cosmo put up a picture of the Honi, which is a bullet vibe and a bit misleading, both because it isn't the toy and because it may encourage people to try something that isn't anal safe as an anal toy. Either way, it's wrong]

I tried to avoid writing a blog post about this, but I'm still reeling hours later so I might as well.

If you're friends with me on my blog facebook profile (feel free to email me if you're interested in being friends- though I will only accept friend requests of companies I like, sex educators, other reviewers, etc, so you know) you'd have seen my angry comment on an article from Cosmo. I know, good sex ideas rarely come from Cosmo these days, but they had a writeup titled "Just Putting it out there: Best Butt Plugs for Beginners" and I had hope, because they included Tantus products.

This, or anything shaped like this, should NEVER EVER go in your butt. Perineal Massage? Ok. Vibes on the outside of the anus? Sure. However, anything without a base should not be inserted- wholly or partially- into the anus. Read on to find out why. 

The problem is, though, that not only are most of the plugs featured not great for beginners- they're too big, too advanced in shape, etc- but they featured the PicoBong Tano. The Tano is an anal safe toy from PicoBong, but they featured a picture of the Honi, their bullet vibe. This is misleading and may cause people to believe that something that isn't anal safe is.

The basic requirements for a butt plug are that it be relatively firm (it's difficult to insert anally otherwise) and that it have a base. The reason for the base is that the anus has two sphincters: the one at the opening of the anus, which you have conscious control of and need to relax in order to put anything in it, and the secondary sphincter, which is a little farther inside the anus and is controlled by the subconscious, like breathing and heartbeat. You need to be relaxed and stress-free for this sphincter to allow anything in the anus. Scared? Worried? Expecting Pain? This sphincter will clamp shut and won't want to let anything in, which is why people expect anal penetration to be painful in the first place. I won't get into how to get to a place where anal penetration can be pleasurable (because yes, it can!) here, because I've got other things to focus on- but you can pick up Jack Morin's Anal Pleasure and Health, which is a fantastic resource, to learn more.

This guy was using a vibrator anally which ended up stuck inside him. He then used salad tongs to attempt to remove it, which also were sucked into his rectum. Then he did the smart thing, and went to the hospital. 
The reason the two sphincters require there to be a base on any butt plug you use is that, since the second sphincter isn't controlled by you, if you put something in the anus that doesn't have a base, it is likely to spasm and pull the object into it. You can't retrieve that- you have to go to the emergency room (which is pricey here in the US, I might add, especially if you go in an Ambulance) to have it removed. Unfortunately, but fortunately for those who end up there, the ER sees a lot of these cases; it's not an uncommon occurrence.

So, what is a good butt plug, specifically one for beginners? You're going to obviously look for something with a base- some are more comfortable than others, depending on the material. Round bases are usually uncomfortable for long term wear (consider butt cheeks), though some toys with round bases are more comfortable than others (crystal delights plugs, for example, though they are more intermediate than beginner). If it has a thinner neck just above the base, it will also be more comfortable- the sphincters want to stay closed, so for beginners who are trying to learn how to relax, the smaller the neck of the plug is above the base, the better. I would also recommend going for a non-porous product- something made from silicone, stainless steel, or glass- because the bum has bacteria in it and porous products will harbor dirt and bacteria and have to be thrown out. A non-porous product is sterilizable, and therefore can be shared between partners once cleaned. Here are my suggestions:


Tantus Little Flirt

I have one of these, and it's a fantastic toy for beginners. The silicone is fairly firm, and though the toy isn't very apparent, I can definitely feel my sphincters relaxing and getting more used to having something in there. It's small and non-intimidating, and the price is pretty hard to beat too. They're $33.99- and two of the colors are on closeout (copper and pearl pink) for just $15. These products are 100% pure premium silicone, the colors are bonded to the toy, they are boilable and can be thrown in the dishwasher to sterilize... They'll last you a lifetime if you treat them right.


Vamp Amos

The Vamp Amos was actually featured in the Cosmo article, and it's one of the toys I agree would be a good beginner. They come in 3 sizes with two densities (regular and softskin). Though I recommend the regular density because it may be easier to insert, the softskin might feel really nice. I can only find the regular density for sale online, but with some sleuthing you could probably find it, or you can contact Vamp Silicone themselves to see where you could find the Amos Softskin. Also really love that on their first page, there's a video featuring the Spare Parts Joque and the Vamp Talula, which I'm considering buying. This one's also silicone, which means it's boilable, dishwashable, and can be completely sterilized.


Happy Valley Silicone Pip 

The Happy Valley Pip is a little different in shape from other beginner butt plugs, which is why I'm including it. Happy Valley does also produce a pretty run of the mill beginner's plug called the Pleasure Plug, but the Pip is definitely an interesting one, and very non-intimidating for people who are just starting out and need to get more comfortable. It's very small (only 3.5 inches in length) and has a long neck and small bulb at the end. It's kind of like anal beads, which are another great anal beginner's toy, but with only one bead. Not only is it a great silicone beginner's toy, but it's only $19.99- making it about in the same price range as beginner jelly rubber (a porous material) plug. If you're nervous about anal play but want to get more comfortable, this may be a good and safe way to start.

Fun Factory Bootie

Another product that was actually in the Cosmo article that I agree with is the Fun Factory Bootie. It's small, has a comfortable base (depending on a few things- if you have a short perineum aka taint, it may poke testicles or tickle your labia) and it's fairly flexible. This is another toy I have in my arsenal, and I think it's a nice one. It has a bulbous but pointed tip, it's curved (great for introducing a male bodied person to prostate stimulation), and it has a thin neck and a thin but long and sturdy flexible base- making it more comfortable if your butt cheeks are sensitive. This is another silicone product, so again- easily sterilizable, will last forever. The bootie is $34, so it's also reasonably priced, especially considering it should last you a long time.


Njoy Pure Plug 

Njoy Pure Plugs are a slightly more advanced toy; though the smallest size is probably good for beginners, it's heavier because it's stainless steel and you can change the temperature of the toy by putting it in cold or warm water (don't boil or freeze, anal tissues are sensitive and thin and extreme temperatures could harm them). However, if you've tried a silicone toy and are looking for something a little different- something hard, heavy, and cold or warm to your liking- the Pure Plugs are a good option. I don't have one myself, but I've heard that the small is a bit smaller than may be necessary. I'd suggest trying to see them in person at your local friendly adult store so you can get a good idea of the size and weight yourself. These products are really fantastic; easy to clean, incredibly smooth surfaces that make for frictionless, easy insertion... I'd highly recommend them if you're looking for something new, even though I haven't tried them myself. Because they're curved, they're also good for prostate stimulation, like the bootie, and the base makes it easy to remove and comfortable. These ones are a little pricier, but SheVibe (check the link) has them on sale as of this writing for just under $50!

Crystal Delights Plug

If you've seen my review of the Crystal Delights plug, you know that it's a little bit big for a beginner. However, You may be able to talk to Shellie of Crystal Delights and find one that has a smaller bulb- all of their products are handmade, so there's some variation. These products are great because they're made of glass; this means of course that they're non-porous and easy to clean, but also that they are frictionless and easy to insert, like the Pure Plugs. Glass, however, isn't as heavy as metal is, which makes it a little bit easier to get used to. Glass can also be put in cold or warm water to change the temperature. Did I mention that they have swarovski crystals in the bases? Or a vintage, glow in the dark medallion? Or you can get them with a vegan or ethical fur fox tail? Yes. They also have a colors for cancer line- plugs made of colored glass that benefit cancer research. These products are the priciest of the ones mentioned here, but I think they're well worth it because they're hand crafted and gorgeous.

In conclusion, you can do good things for your butt. With the right beginner plug, you can help it be more comfortable with penetration and get to know your body better. Just please, please don't put anything in your butt without a base- it'll end badly.

3 comments:

  1. Thank you. Tantus' Little Flirt has been the epitome of "Beginner Plug" since we began selling in 1998. I am grateful but surprised they chose more advanced plugs and left the Little Flirt out.

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    1. I was kind of confused by that as well. Don't get me wrong- I really like the design of the Juice and Twist, they're creative and very high quality, and I really love the bases they have, at least from the pictures I've seen- but they don't say 'beginner plug' to me. The Little Flirt, however, was my personal choice for a beginner toy and one I highly recommend. I'm a huge fan of Tantus- thanks for commenting on my post! I really appreciate what you've done with Tantus and don't know what I'd do without a body safe company like it around.

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  2. Fabulous post! Thank you so much for this.
    I feel like there's a lot of miss-information out there when it comes to butt plugs, and it's nice to have a good list of toys that really are for beginners (and really anal-safe).

    Just a note, I'm a total beginner when it comes to anal play. I started right off with the nJoy Pure Plug Medium without any issues/problems due to size.

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